Great...More Wierdos
by Selphine
Summary: CHAPTER TWO NOW UP!!!! Ranma and company get a free trip to Jusenkyou, and as it turns out, a free trip to ancient china! Now, when they thought life couldn't get any wierder, they are stuck with a clueless miko who has to summon a giant chicken. Might ge
1. I'm stuck in ancient china, and some's J...

Kasumi looked down at the mail. She sifted through the envelopes, searching for   
something interesting. "Oh my!" she said.  
  
"What?"  
"I said, a free trip to china," Kasumi repeated.  
Ranma jumped up, and began to dance. "Never gonna be a girl again, never   
gonna be a girl again," he said in a sing song voice.  
I'll cure the pig! Ryoga almost said the happy words out loud. And then Akane   
and I can……… Ryoga gave himself a nosebleed thinking about it.   
"This is great!" Mousse cried. He glomped onto Ranma. "Shampoo, did you hear   
that?"  
"Why don't you…tell her that," Ranma said, kicking Mousse into the air.  
"Shampoo be cat no more! Spend rest of life with Ranma!"  
Genma held up a sign that said "Great!"  
"Hey, Kasumi," Ranma said, "how many people can we bring?"  
Kasumi checked the letter again. "It says we have our own private jet."  
Many jaws dropped around the room.   
  
  
A very exhausted pack of travelers arrived at Jusenkyo. Shampoo was at the   
head of the pack, racing for Nyannichuan. "Shampoo!" Mousse cried, following   
her. Being as nearsighted as he was, he accidentally knocked her into the pond.   
He waited a few minutes, and then when she didn't come up, he did a very   
stupid thing: he dove into the spring. Mousse didn't come up. "Serves him right,"   
Ranma muttered.   
"Oh no!" Ranma heard a familiar voice. "Very tragic story happen to those who   
jump in spring."   
"What are they gonna turn into?" Akane asked.   
"Oh, this very special spring. Spring is portal to another world."  
"WHAT???!!"  
"Yes," the Jusenkyo guide said. "Spring take travelers to Universe of Four Gods."  
Just then, the last of the pack arrived. "Akaaaaaaaneeeeeeeee!" Akane   
squealed as Happosai glomped onto her rear. Ukyo took her spatula and   
whacked the old pervert. Unfortunately, everyone fell in the spring like a line of   
Dominos.   
"Uh-oh," she said. "Ran-chan," she yelled, and jumped into the spring.  
  
  
Ranma-chan found herself floating in a deep pond. Se crawled out, and lay on   
the grass. Whoa, what a trip! She thought to herself. Universe of The Four   
Gods, huh? This could be interesting. She sat up, rubbing her head. Standing   
above her was a woman, dressed in Chinese clothing. Her long purple hair was   
done in a bun on top of her head, the rest flowing around her shoulders.   
"Hotohori-sama, I've found the intruder," she yelled.   
"Whoa, wait a minute there," Ranma said. "You got this all wrong, miss. I ain't   
an intruder."  
The woman stared at her. "You mean you're not from Kutou?"  
"What? Kutou? What's that?"  
"It's not an intruder," the woman yelled. She turned to Ranma. "Sorry about   
that. I'm Chou Ryuen, better known as the Suzaku Seishi Nuriko."  
"Suzaku?"  
"You're not from here, are you?"  
"Uh, I don't think so, Miss."  
Nuriko helped Ranma up. "Miss?"  
"You look like a girl, so Miss."  
Nuriko flared. "Whaddya mean, I look like a girl?" She looked down. "Just   
reminiscing. It's hard to break old habits. See, I'm not exactly a girl."  
Ranma smiled. "I'm not exactly a girl, either. By the way, my name's Ranma   
Saotome, of the Saotome school of Anything-Goes Martial Arts. "  
The two walked away from the pond. "So you fell in the drowned springs too,   
huh?"  
"Um, not exactly," Nuriko said.  
Ranma took a double look at Nuriko's chest. Nothing. "Oh, so you're a cross-  
dresser!"  
"But you're not." Nuriko stared at Ranma's breasts. "So how can you not be a   
woman?"  
"It's a long story," Ranma said. "My dad took me on this training trip, and we fell   
in these cursed springs. So now, cold water changes him into a panda, and I,   
well, become a girl."  
Nuriko's eyes had glazed over. "Oh, is that really possible? Turning into a   
woman, I mean? I wish that had happened to me! Then Hotohori-sama and I   
could……."  
"Who's Hotohori?"  
"Only the beautiful emperor of Konan."   
"Konan?"  
"Boy, you're definitely not from around here. Where are you from, anyway?"  
"Nerima."  
Nuriko had a bemused look on his face. "Nerima?"  
"Yeah, in Tokyo."  
"Oh! Is that, by any chance, in another world?"  
"I don't think this is my world, so I guess so."  
"That's wonderful. Miaka will be so happy to meet you."  
"Miaka?"  
"Suzaku no Miko, herself. She somehow got transported to this world."  
"Do you know how she got here?"  
"No, she never told us."  
Ranma thought for a second. "So, where are we going?" she asked.  
"Inside," Nuriko replied, a smug grin on his face  
"I know that! Inside where?"  
"Inside the Konan Imperial Palace. You're on the palace grounds. Miaka actually   
almost drowned in that pond you were in."  
"Why would she do that?"  
Nuriko took a breath. "Well, when Hotohori-sama and Tama-chan found me,   
they thought I was a woman. Miaka and Tama-chan were trapped under a   
building, so I lifted it off of them. Miaka thanked me afterwards, but I didn't   
really like that she was getting close to my Hotohori-sama, so I told her that I   
had lost an earring in that pond. She went to look for it, and" Nuriko mumbled.   
"kindasortafellin." Nuriko was quiet for a second. He instantly cheered up. "But   
that's okay, because Tama-chan loves her, and I know she loves him. So we're   
on good terms now." He paused again. "I actually stopped cross-dressing   
recently, because it was easier to protect Miaka in boy's clothes. But old habits   
are hard to break."  
"So is Miaka inside?"  
"No, right now she's in Kutou." Nuriko's face fell as he said the words. "Tama-  
chan went after her, and Chichiri's there too."  
They approached the entrance to Nuriko's room. "Come in; I'll get you a fresh   
change of clothes. You must me freezing."  
"I have some extras," Ranma said, referring to her backpack. "But they're wet   
too."  
  
  
A few minutes later, Ranma emerged, dressed in Nuriko's clothes. She wore a   
long red tunic over loose black pants, and shoes with long laces. Nuriko wore   
similar clothing, but the tunic was hot pink and the pale yellow. His purple hair   
was done in a long braid flipped over his shoulder. He looks more like a guy now,   
Ranma thought. "Um," she said, "can I have some hot water?"  
Nuriko looked puzzled. "Okay," he said.  
The two were making their way to the dining room, when Ranma heard a squeal.   
"Nurikoooooooooo!" the voice cried. "We're back!"  
Ranma stared as a young girl with glomped onto Nuriko. She had brown hair,   
done up in two buns with red ribbons, and wore a brown school uniform with a   
white shirt and a turquoise bow. Behind her were two men. The first one had   
dark aqua hair tied into a loose ponytail, and wore a blue shirt with yellow details   
and dark blue pants. The second had blue hair that stuck straight up, and a   
strange expression on his face. He was wearing a white shirt with black pants,   
and over it a blue cloak with a circled blue pattern. He had a hat slung on his   
back, and beads around his neck. This is definitely a strange bunch, Ranma   
thought, but not that much stranger than the weirdoes I deal with at home.   
Nuriko must have noticed her staring, because he started to introduce the new   
people. "Guys, this is Ranma.  
"Ohayo no da," the blue haired man said. "I'm Chichiri na no da."  
"Hey," the man with the ponytail said. "I'm Tamahome."  
The girl smiled. "I'm Miaka Yuuki," she said cheerfully. Miaka looked as if a light   
bulb had gone off in her head. "Hold still a second." She began taking off   
Ranma's tunic.  
Ranma watched as she inspected her body. "Um," She said. "Do you mind?"   
"Miaka-chan, why don't you just ask her?"  
"Oh yeah!" Everyone sweatdropped. "Are you one of the Suzaku Seishi?"  
"What's that?" Everyone sweatdropped again.  
"You mean you haven't heard of the Seven Seishi of Suzaku?" Tamahome looked   
surprised. Ranma shook her head.  
"Ranma," Chichiri said, "Are you by any chance from another world no da?"  
Nuriko patted Ranma's shoulder. "I found her by the pond this evening with a   
backpack. She didn't know where she was, so I offered to let her stay with us for   
a bit."  
Miaka perked up. "Where are you from?" she asked.  
"Nerima." Ranma replied.   
Miaka now looked very excited. "Nerima? As in Tokyo?"  
Ranma nodded. "Yeah."  
"Yay! Tamahome, she's from our world. Isn't that amazing?" Miaka said,   
glomping onto Ranma.  
"Uh, Miaka, how about we go eat now?" Tamahome suggested.  
Miaka looked absolutely delighted. "Yeah! Let's EAT!"  
  
  
Ranma sat at the dinner table. It was long, and she was sitting between Nuriko   
and Miaka, who was sitting next to Tamahome. On Nuriko's other side was   
another man, who Nuriko had introduced as Hotohori, "the beautiful emperor of   
Konan." Chichiri was sitting across from Nuriko, on Hotohori's other side. Along   
the ends of the table were many counselors and other such people.   
"Miss Ranma," a handmaiden said. "Your hot water."  
"Arigato," Ranma said, and stood up. She took the hot water, and emptied it   
over her head. Every one stared as Ranma grew taller, curveless, and his hair   
color changed to black.   
Nuriko looked dumbfounded. "I wish that happened to me!" he squealed.   
"Ranma, you're so lucky!"  
Miaka turned to Ranma and began to feel him up, as she had done with Hotohori   
in the second episode. "You're a boy now."  
Ranma smiled sheepishly. "Um, yeah."  
"That's so cool!" Nuriko's eyes were glazed over.  
Hotohori coughed. "Back to the subject of Ranma………" After he had gotten   
their attention, he continued. "We need to figure out how he has gotten here,   
and what to do."   
"Yeah, how DID you get here?"  
"A spring," Ranma replied. "We all went on a trip to China, and we all fell in the   
spring. Ukyo knocked us in." He paused for a second. "It was really all that   
pervert Happosai's fault."  
"You mean there are others from your world?"  
"Yeah. A whole bunch of us. I think we somehow got scattered."  
"How many no da?"  
"Let's see……. Akane, Mousse, Shampoo, Ryoga, Ukyo, Kuno, my old man, Soun,   
Kasumi, Nabiki, Happosai, the old ghoul, I think Kuno brought that ninja guy,   
yeah, that's it."  
Hotohori rested his chin on his hand. "The all fell in?"  
Ranma nodded. "I think so. Ukyo's pretty strong."  
  
  
Ranma lay on a bed in his room and stared up at the canopy. Everything he had   
been told so far had baffled him. Not much did, these days, but the idea of   
looking for seven people so a girl from another world could summon a god was a   
little strange.  
It had been a long, sleepless night. I was lucky, he thought. The others could be   
hurt, or worse. Mentally, he kicked himself. Tomorrow. Tomorrow, I'm going to   
go looking for them. With that thought in his head, he let himself fall asleep.   
He was awoken by a high-pitched scream. Jumping out of bed and running   
through the hall, he collided into Miaka. They both fell down, rubbing their   
heads. Ranma was about to chew her out for crashing into him when he noticed   
a small wimpering noise. Standing up, he saw Miaka bawling on the floor. Her   
eyes were red, and tears streamed down her cheeks. Clutched in her hand was a   
folded piece of paper. "T-T-Tamahome's gooooooooone!" She wailed. "L-Last   
night, when the kutou assassin a-a-attacked, he said he wouldn't l-l-leave   
meeeeeee!"  
Damn, she sure whines a lot! "Are you sure?"  
"Y-y-yeah."  
It wasn't long before Hotohori and Nuriko came running, and Chichiri teleported   
in. "Miaka! What is the matter?"   
Miaka threw her arms around Hotohori and sniffled into his robe. "T-T-  
Tamahome's goooooooooooooooonnnnnnne!!!!!!!!!"  
Nuriko snatched the note from Miaka's fist. " 'Miaka, I've gone to Kutou as a   
hostage to buy you some time to find the three remaining seishi. When all of   
them are gathered, I will come back to you.' Aww, that's so romaaaaaantic!   
Don't you think so, Hotohori-sama?"  
  
  
A few hours later, Ranma found himself saddling a horse. Nuriko had insisted he   
come along, to help Miaka search for the other seishi. He was too embarrassed   
to tell Nuriko he didn't know how to ride, and Chichiri was busy hopping around   
in SD screaming DAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! Ranma guessed he was trying to lighten   
the mood, but so far all it had done was make Hotohori and his advisors shake   
their heads in dismay.  
"Alright! Let's get going!" Miaka crowed, thrusting her fist into the open air. Well,   
she's considerably perkier, Ranma noted, tying his backpack to the saddle.  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. A bandit, a tomboy, and a whole lotta un...

*****YES!!! I got ALL of the files from my old computer back, including chapter   
two. Thanks to all my reviewers; Kaoru Kamiya, Chiad, Gami-chan, Yameno   
Tenshi, Hime Pisa, *Azumi Yui*, Demos the Battousai, Sailor Lala no Baka (I've   
know her since grade 3. I have a right to say that. Especially since it's true!),   
Ryuen, DemonicCatGirl, The Demon Princess, Chibi_ukyou, Abby, and Lanen. I   
hope everyone likes chapter to!  
Selph*****  
  
  
  
Great.More Wierdos  
Chapter Two  
By Selphine  
  
  
  
  
"OUCH!!!" Akane landed on the hard dirt road, in the middle of someplace that   
was definitely NOT Jusenkyo. Great, she thought. Where the hell am I?  
She stood up, dusting the dirt off her skirt, and looked around. People hurried   
around the marketplace, wearing clothes that somewhat resembled Ranma's.   
China? She glanced again, and noticed no strollers, hi-tech message boards,   
or trendy clothing stores. ANCIENT China??!!  
She sighed, and picked up her fallen backpack, flicking a bug off of it. Slinging it   
on her shoulder, she gripped the straps with both hands, and began to walk.  
  
***********  
  
A figure in a trenchcoat watched Akane from the trees, grinning like the drunk   
idiot he was.  
  
***********  
  
"Um, excuse me, miss, but could you tell me where jusenkyo is?" Akane tapped   
an elegant woman on the shoulder.   
"Jusenkyo?" The woman repeated.  
"Yeah," Akane replied. "Jusenkyo." The woman had no clue. "Drowned springs?"   
she supplied. "In the Bayankala Mountain range?"  
The woman thought for a second, then replied. "I don't know much about   
geography, but the closest mountain is Mount Leikaku, right over there."  
"Thank you," Akane said, turning.  
"Be careful," the woman warned. "It's packed with bandits."  
  
***********   
  
The figure in the trees pulled some paper out of his pocket, eyeing Akane's large   
backpack.  
  
***********  
  
***********  
"Um," Ranma said from his horse. "Chichiri left."  
"Damn!" Nuriko shouted. "I'd go back, but that would take too much time..."  
"I'm huuuuuuungry." Miaka was practically falling off her and Nuriko's horse.  
"Decision made," Nuriko stated. "There's a town up ahead."  
  
***********  
  
***********  
  
Akane had been wandering for quite some time now, and was beginning to lose   
hope. She had no idea where she was, and no idea why she had wandered into   
a forest. Either way, she was tired, and when fangs glimmered in the distance,   
she made a mistake and ran to greet the owner of the fangs.   
"Ryoga!"  
The figure gave a grin and hoisted Akane over his shoulder, leaping into the   
night sky.  
  
***********  
  
Akane awoke in a small room, and felt ropes around her wrists. She was glad   
she wasn't gagged, because if she had, she wouldn't have been able to do the   
following:  
  
The figure entered the room, scratching his head. Before he even had a chance   
to spea-  
"BAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKA!!!!!!!!!!!"  
Man, that felt good! Akane thought. She could now make out the appearance   
of her captor. Flame-red hair flew wildly around his face, reaching golden eyes   
that had a touch of mischeviousness. He smirked, with a fang poking out over   
his bottom lip. He was dressed simply without his trenchcoat, in a plain white   
shirt and beige pants tucked into black boots. The only jewelery he wore was a   
beaded necklace and earrings.   
Before she knew it, the man had began fishing through her backpack. Out came   
clothes, books, a wallet, bras-   
"DON'T TOUCH THAT, YOU HENTAI!!!!!"  
"What th' fuck are you talking about? I can't stand women. So why th' hell would   
I want one of." He dangled the lacy yellow bra by its strap- "these??!!"  
He turned it over in his hands, then reached in the bag and pulled out a rolled up   
sock. "Is this a slingshot?"   
Placing the sock in one of the cups, he pulled back and let it fire. "Fuckin'   
Awesome!" he cried as it thunked Akane in the forehead. "I want one of these!!!"  
"That's not a slingshot, you dummy!"  
"Yeah? Then what the fuck is it, then?"  
"It's-" Akane blushed. "-a brassiere. Women use it to.to."  
He tossed the bra on the floor and shrugged. "Whatever. If it's got something to   
do with women, I don't want to have anything to do with it."  
He fished out a package of instant ramen, flipping it over. "What the fuck is   
this?"  
"Instant ramen. You put it in boiling water and eat it."  
The man sighed. "You got anything valuable in there?" He gestured at the bag.   
Akane shook her head.   
"Damn! And I thought strange looking people were usually loaded!"  
Akane kicked him.  
"Owwwww!" He wailed. "Figgers. Another reason I hate women."  
"So what? I hate men."  
He looked at her. "Good. Hey, if I untie you, don't go tellin' on me or nothin', k?"  
Akane nodded. "I'm Akane Tendo."  
He looked up from untying her hands. "Genrou. Call me anything else an' I'll kill   
ya."  
As it so happened, Genrou was fascinated by the instant ramen. He was also   
unsuspecting when Akane offered to make some, and baffled when she got all   
excited.  
  
***********  
  
***********  
  
Miaka plopped down a sack of money on the table. "Give us lots of food, we   
have the money!"  
"Um, Miaka," Nuriko whispered. "Maybe that's not such a good idea."  
"Of course it is," Miaka chirped. "We have more than enough to pay for it."  
"What I mean is, if they see we've got cash, well, you know, and there's lots of   
bandits around here and all."  
Man! Ranma thought. Nabiki would have her head! He went back to   
observing the conversation between Miaka and Nuriko. "Why are you so damn   
cheerful? You don't have to pretend!!"  
CRACK! Nuriko had broken the table.  
  
***********  
  
"Yay!! Food! Let's eat!"   
Ranma gazed at all the food that Miaka had ordered for them, and began filling   
his plate, shoveling it into his mouth and repeating, while Miaka did the same,   
except she skipped step one. Nuriko managed to grab a bowl of rice and some   
potstickers.   
"Great," Nuriko mused. "TWO people with bottomless stomaches."  
It wasn't long before Miaka and Ranma had cleared the table, Miaka keeling   
over. "Miaka!" Nuriko cried. "Food poisoning!"  
A fat ugly man who appeared to be a waiter pulled a knife out of his pocket and   
swung it down, barely allowing Nuriko to catch it. Nuriko lay on the floor, knife   
clenched between his palms. Ranma dove for the man, but another caught him,   
holding a knife up to his forehead. If it had been Kuno with a bokken, Ranma   
could have beaten him easily, but he had little experience with actual swords.  
He stood there in fear, until one swinging flash of silver cut both men off. Behind   
them stood the emperor Hotohori, dressed in common clothes, his long chestnut   
hair fastened with a tie at his back.   
"Hotohori-sama!" Nuriko cried, glomping onto the man that had saved his life.  
And the bandits took that moment to capture them.  
  
***********  
  
***********  
  
Akane sighed. Genrou was leaning out the window, throwing up. She didn't want   
to kick him in the face like she usually did to Ranma, she actually felt sorry for   
the poor guy.   
Ranma. I never thought I'd miss him. And I have no idea where I am.   
Genrou shrugged on his trenchcoat. "I'm going out for a while. Goin' back to th'   
hideout."  
And with that, he leaped out the door.  
  
***********  
  
***********  
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji, with one of the keptured girls for th'   
boss." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t' see ya, come right in." "Thenk you."  
Miaka looked up at the navy haired bandit talking to himself. Opening the door,   
he shoved her into the room, then promptly shut it and left.  
  
***********  
  
"Exactly how did we get ourselves into this?" Nuriko whispered to Hotohori.   
"We're in a room full of drunk bandits, who happen to think we're both GIRLS?"  
"They recognize true beauty," Hotohori replied in a falsetto voice from across the   
table. "Of COURSE, with a face like mine, it would be hard not to."  
"Of course, your majesty." Nuriko loved the man, but he was a bit vain   
sometimes. "Hey, where'd they take Ranma?"  
"No idea," replied Hotohori, as a very female Ranma walked in with her hair   
loose and hanging down over her shoulders.  
"Hey boys," she cooed. "Who wants to get me a drink?"  
"I think I'm going to be sick," Hotohori mumbled under his breath as dozens of   
bandits threw themselves at Ranma's feet.  
"One at a time boys, one at a time."  
"Ranma!" Nuriko called. "Lead them over here!"  
"No thanks!" Ranma replied. "I'm doing it my way!" And with a large football   
kick, she sent them flying towards Nuriko, who slammed them into the wall with   
a table.  
"You are.men?" one of the bandits said in awe.  
"Thank you, captain obvious."  
  
************  
  
"Yummy.double yummy. alright!"  
Miaka slowly inched away from the fat pervert who was eyeing her body. Ok,   
Miaka, you can do this. Remember, Hotohori, Nuriko, and Ranma's situation is   
probably a lot worse than yours.  
"'Ey Eiken. Seems you've found yourself a bride already." Standing in the   
windowsill, his face silhouetted in the moonlight, was a lanky youth with flame-  
red hair.  
"You got it all wrong!" Miaka cried. "I'm not his bride!"  
"Miaka!" Miaka turned to the door, seeing Hotohori, Ranma, and Nuriko with his   
fist in the disassembled door. Nuriko promptly removed the door from his fist,   
and proceeded to show off just how strong he was, by picking up random   
bandits, and tossing them over his head.  
From behind the stranger, wolves leapt out. They lunged on Nuriko, Hotohori,   
and Ranma, attacking them. Hotohori sliced one with his sword, to reveal a piece   
of paper in its place, cut in half.  
The stranger took these moments of distraction to leap out of the   
window, Miaka slung over his shoulder.  
  
"PUT ME DOWN!!!" Akane could swear she heard a girl's voice, and sure enough,   
Genrou soon landed with a girl on his back. He sighed and set her down.   
"Holy fuck! D'ya think ya coulda screamed just a bit louder??!!"  
The girl responded with a high-pitched shriek, and Akane covered her ears. "I   
think that was a rhetorical question."  
"Nani? Reh - toh- ree- call? What's that?"  
"A question that's not supposed to be answered."  
"Oh." The girl smiled, noticing her. "Did he kidnap you, too?"  
Akane nodded. "Yeah, kinda. But I'm kinda lost here, so he's helping me out."  
Genrou lit an oil lamp, and Akane saw the girl squinting.   
"I'm Miaka Yuuki," the girl replied.  
Akane extended her hand. "Akane Tendo."  
Miaka thought for a moment. "Akane tendo. somehow that name sounds   
familiar." A lightbulb went off in her head. " You're Ranma's fianc‚e!"  
Before Miaka could react, Akane had rushed over to her and was gripping her   
shirt. "How do you know Ranma??!!" She demanded.  
"A-A-Akane, let me breathe."  
Akane loosened her grip. "He was right when he said you were a violent girl,"   
Miaka said, panting.  
'He said that about me?' Akane thought.   
"Any ways, while we were in Kutou, he kinda fell into a pond at the palace and   
Nuriko rescued him. He said he was from my world."  
"Where is he now?"  
"Back at the bandit place with Hotohori and Nuriko and a few dozen drunk and   
violent bandits."  
"So," Akane said, taking this all into thought. "You're from Tokyo, too?"  
"Yup!" Miaka chirped. "I'm Suzaku no Miko! I gotta find the seven seishi of   
Suzaku and then make three wishes!!"  
"Ok," Akane said, not quite understanding all of that.   
"Hey, that reminds me," Miaka said. "Mr. Bandit-guy, do you have any symbols   
on your body that swell up an' grow?"  
"No!!" Genrou said from the corner, still feeling quite nauseous after eating   
Akane's cooking.  
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t'see ya, sorry fer   
ingnorin' ya back at the place." "Dat's okay."  
The door opened and Miaka recognized the navy haired bandit from the hideout.   
As soon as Genrou saw him, the two linked arms and ran around in circles, the   
two girls staring at them, bewildered.  
"I have seen a lot of crazy shit since I came her, but that tops it all."  
Ranma stood in the doorcase, now male and grinning wickedly.  
  
  
  
*****YAY!! Another chapter done. How'd you like that one? I'm debating   
whether or not to do the whole mitsukake/shouka thing. I might not even do the   
whole evil tamahome thing. What happens depends on you. Give me your   
ideas!!! Things that definitely will happen: Nuriko NOT dying, Happosai's   
encounter with Soi, some ranma/akane romance, Hotohori chopping up Kuno's   
bokken, Miaka and Akane cooking dinner, and Ranma freaking out about Tama-  
neko.*****  
  
  



	3. Seishi No. 5, and proof that Miaka was d...

"I have seen a lot of crazy shit since I came her, but that tops it all 

Well, here it is, chapter 3! This is the first series I've actually gotten into writing. And I think it's pretty good. 

I'm really happy that ff.n is back up and running. And next chapter, the WAFF (Warm and Fuzzy Feelings) starts. 

**Selph** 

"I have seen a lot of crazy shit since I came her, but that tops it all." 

Ranma stood in the doorcase, now male and grinning wickedly. 

"Ranma!!!" Ranma found himself plowed over by akane, who ran up and hugged him. Realizing what she was doing, she let go, and placed her hands on her hips. "Where the hell have you been, BAKA?" 

Ranma, still recovering from Akane's bear hug, smiled. "Long story." 

Akane glared. "I fell into a pond, Nuriko fished me out, Tamahome left, and now I'm traveling with Miaka and Nuriko to find the remaining three suzaku seishi." 

Akane stared up at him. "Huh?" 

Ranma smiled again. "I'll explain later. Now," he said, cracking his knuckles towards Genrou, "some dirtbag's gonna PAY for kidnapping two pretty girls." 

Akane blushed. `Pretty?' Had Ranma, the fiancée with a reputation for calling her uncute, just called her `pretty'? 

Genrou, still dancing around with Kouji, stopped. "Me?" 

"Yeah, you." 

Genrou stared blankly at him. "Who the FUCK are YOU?" 

Ranma grinned. He loved doing this. It always made him look so dramatic. "I'm Ranma Saotome, of the Saotome School of anything-goes martial arts," he said, leaping into the air. He shrugged off his backpack somewhat gracefully, and chucked it at Miaka. "Here, hold my bag a sec." 

The impact, combined with the weight, pushed Miaka to the ground. Miaka sat there for a few moments blinking, then attempted to push the bag off. Akane just rolled her eyes. How many times had she gone through with that? `I swear, he's such a show-off.' She thought. `A show off that just called me pretty.' She blushed again, and then mentally kicked herself. `Baka! That shouldn't affect me!' She turned back to the fight, just in time to see Ranma kick Genrou in the head. `Oh well, he's got a pretty thick head. That shouldn't hurt him.' 

Genrou was about to unleash his phantom wolves when Akane stepped in. "Stop it!!" She cried. "You don't even KNOW each other!!!" 

Both Ranma and Genrou stopped. Akane took a deep breath. "Ranma, Genrou. Genrou, Ranma." Ranma put his hand protectively around Akane. "MY fiancée. Touch her, and die." 

Genrou nodded, and Akane blushed. Whenever Ranma called her `Mine' like that, it was like a thousand lightning bolts rushing through her veins. "Ranma…" She said quietly. 

Ranma felt strange, having his arm being around Akane's shoulders. Quickly, he jerked it back, and dusted his hands. "Now that that's settled, would some one mind explaining?" 

"Yeah," Akane said. "I'm STILL confused." 

"Sho I'm the prieshtesh of Shuzaku," Miaka said, her mouth full of potato chips. She swallowed, the resumed talking. "My true love, Tamahome" -as she said this, her eyes gazed over- "is in Kutou, with Nakago. He's bad." 

Akane nodded. So far, she was clear on the story. Miaka shoveled more food into her mouth. "An' N'riko, Ranma, an' I went to go look for the ozzer free sheishi of shuzaku. An' zen `oto'ori showed up, an' we went to the reshtarant, and theesh bandits capshured ush, an' den thish guy here" -she pointed at Genrou- " kinnapped me an' took me to thish plashe. Goddet?" 

Akane, Genrou, and Kouji all nodded, cringing. `Man!' Akane thought. `This girl eats more than Ranma!' 

Ranma turned towards Akane. "So now tell me what YOU've been doin', Akane." 

"Well…" Akane started. "I landed here, and I saw Genrou's fangs, thought he was Ryoga, and he took me here." 

"She poisoned me," Genrou muttered under his breath. "Damn `Instant Ramen'." 

"Figgers," Ranma replied. "Dumb macho-chick can't even boil water." He was greeted with Akane's mallet meeting his skull. 

Miaka smiled cheerily. "Genrou, you wanna be the bandit boss, right?" 

"Hell yeah." 

"O-kay! Let's launch operation let's-get-Genrou-back-as-boss!" 

"Whee." 

Ranma stared at Miaka. "She's going overboard, isn't she," he whispered to Akane. 

"I think she passed that line a while ago," Akane replied. They were crouching in the bushes outside the hideout, watching Miaka do a little cheer. "I didn't know boss rhymed with hostage." 

"It doesn't." 

"Ah." Akane blushed. "Uh, Ranma?" 

"Yeah?" 

"What you said earlier, about me being pretty…" she paused, twirling her thumbs. "Did you mean it?" 

Ranma was stunned. It wasn't fair for Akane to put him on the spot like that, but he didn't really feel like being malleted through the trees. "I guess." 

Akane blushed. She certainly wasn't expecting this. She had expected him to say that she was an uncute tomboy, or that he had no interest in being engaged to a girl like her. She sat there, and began to play with a loose thread on her skirt. 

Ranma watched her. *Did* he really mean it? He thought about it for a second. She was attractive, that was true. It wasn't her *looks* that made her uncute, just her personality. But then again, it was that violent, impulsive thing about her that he loved. `Wait a second. Did I just say `loved'? Akane *is* pretty, so that's not a lie, not really. But I don't *love* her, do I?' 

His heart began to beat faster in his chest than it ever had before. He thought Akane could sense that, by the way she was now close to cutting off the circulation in her finger with the thread. "Stop it," he said. "It's bad to do that." 

Miraculously, Akane stopped. She unwound her finger from the thread, then shook it a little bit. "Sorry, Ranma." 

It was now Ranma's turn to blush. "I-I-I was just concerned, that's all." 

Akane smiled. "Thank you, Ranma. Thank you for caring." 

Ranma just stared at her. The way she was acting; sweet, and kind, was different. Instead of just looking cute, she was acting cute too. He wondered if she was doing this on purpose, or if this was just the way she acted when they were alone and not insulting each other. 

Alone… 

Or maybe not. Genrou popped up behind them, squishing their shoulders together. "Aww, look at the lovebirds." 

Ranma moved as far away from Akane as he could without getting pricked by a thorn. "NO WAY!!" 

"Shut up, BAKA!!" Akane yelled. Ranma couldn't tell if it was aimed at him or Genrou. He hoped it was at Genrou. `Two steps forward, one step back,' he thought. `Oh well, at least it's not our dads interfering.' 

He crouched in anticipation of the mallet, but it never came. Instead, the next sound he heard was- 

"OH, SHIT!" Genrou cried. "I left the fucking spell cards with Miaka!" 

The bandit ran off, leaving the two teenagers from Nerima alone in the bushes again. For a while they just stared at each other, hearts beating rapidly. 

"You idiot! Ya wrote all over them!" 

"Oopsie." Miaka inched away from Genrou, who was becoming scary. 

"My bad." 

"Damn right your bad!" Genrou rolled up his sleeve, preparing to punch the lights out of a certain priestess. 

"I said I was sorry!" Miaka cried, when she noticed a flash of red shining through one of Genrou's arm bandages. Instantly cured of her fear, she leapt onto him, unwrapping the cloth. 

Genrou was strong, but not nearly strong enough to hold off the persistent miko on a mission. "Alright!" she cried, whipping off the bandage. "You're one of the Suzaku Seishi!" 

"Fuck," Genrou mumbled. "Just got back an' I gotta leave again." 

Miaka studied the symbol more closely. "You're Tasuki, right?" 

"Yeah," he replied. 

CLONK!!! Genrou, or Tasuki, swept the girl up in his arms, leaping over the fallen tree. He landed on it, and set Miaka down to find a purple-headed person (he couldn't figure out if it was a man or woman) flexing their muscles. "Watch where the fuck ye're pointin' that thing!" 

Purple-head looked up. "Hey, Miaka! Good to see you're still alive! Hotohori-sama was getting worried!" 

"Nuriiiiiiiiiiiiiko!!" Miaka ran off the tree and into the stranger's arms. "Guess what? We found the fifth seishi, and one of Ranma's friends!" 

"That's great. Who's seishi no.5?" 

"Tasuki." Miaka pointed to the bandit, still standing on the tree. 

"This kidnapper's a seishi??!!" 

"Hmph." Tasuki snorted. "I feel so fuckin' welcome." 

Miaka smiled energetically. "So where's Hotohori?" 

"Back at the hideout," Nuriko replied. "He had some…uh…unfinished business." He refrained from mentioning that one of the bandits had become a permanent attachment to the emperor's waist. Hotohori had refused to let anyone see him like this. 

Tasuki had now hopped off the log and was standing next to Miaka and Nuriko, whose gender he was still questioning. "Izzat a guy or a chick?" 

"Okama," Miaka replied cheerfully. "Hey, Tasuki, where's Ranma and Akane?" 

"Doing suzaku-knows-what in a bush over there." 

"That's nice," She replied. 

"Hey," Nuriko said. "Ranma didn't say he had a girlfriend." 

"Fiancée," Miaka answered. 

"Well," Nuriko commented. "THAT just clears everything up." 

"Sorry, Akane," Ranma stared at the earthen ground, trying to avoid eye contact. 

Akane stood, brushing leaves from her hair. "Ranma…" 

"Yeah?" 

"This is a stupid question, and I understand if you don't wanna answer it, and if you don't, just forget about it…" 

"Ask." 

Akane swallowed. "W-Which fiancée do you like best?" 

Ranma sat down again. "You," he said hesitantly. "I guess." 

When Akane didn't say anything, he spoke up again. "Kodachi's psychotic, Shampoo's obsessed and over affectionate, and Ucchan's just a friend." 

"What about me?" 

"You…you're pretty much my best friend, Akane. With me an' Pop movin' so much, I never really had time to make friends. So you're my best friend…maybe more." 

Akane blushed. "Thank you, Ranma. That… That means a lot to me, that you think of it that way." Brushing her bangs aside, she sat down next to Ranma. "I just wanted to thank you, again." 

"For what?" 

Akane laughed. "Well, ever since you came here, there's never been a dull moment. Plus," she said, slugging him playfully, "I needed a new punching bag." 

Ranma smiled. "I wanna ask you something, too." 

"Go ahead." 

"If we had met, just us, without the whole curse thing, an' bein' engaged an' our pops an' all, would you have…" He paused, blushing. 

"Liked you?" 

"Yeah." 

"Well," Akane said. "The circumstances would have been different, but that doesn't change anything." 

"Oh," Ranma said, somewhat disappointed. 

"I'd like you either way." 

Ranma's eyes lit up. "Really?" 

"Yes! Calm down. I like you, okay?" 

"So I'm not a pervert?" 

"It's kinda hard to get used to the whole curse thing." 

"I'M the one that has to BE cursed." 

"Yeah." 

"Akane?" 

"Yeah?" 

"How- How *much* do you like me?" 

"In what way?" 

Ranma paused. He didn't expect her to ask that question. It would have been a whole lot easier if she hadn't. Summoning up his courage, he brought his face close to hers. 

"This way." 

///*sniff* so romantic… I hope ya liked it!/// 

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